Friday, December 30, 2016

Reflections @ 2016

2016 flew. 12 months passed by. When we were in the month of January, we thought, "God, it is going to be a long year." Never did we realized that today as i am typing my way in my little space in this world wide web, a year has gone. It is an amazing year, so much to be thankful of. As i am writing this, i do not know why, but tears are welling out. Probably, we had gone through a lot this year and to think back on how we made it through with God's grace, we have no words to describe how tough yet sweet it is and we are here because of the support we have from the Almighty, and also you, our dearest family and friends, from near and far. Yes, that is 2016! 

Our last trip as twosome. Isa joined us but she was in my womb. It was tired but very joyful trip. 

Met up with my pregnancy buddy which was also my high school classmates. Our babies are due almost the same date :D it was a beautiful pregnancy journey with you, Ellis. I truly enjoy every updates exchanged with you during our monthly check up.

Baby Isa is growing in me and I am enjoying every single moment.


Had a blast with my spanish family welcoming baby Isabella. Feeling beyond blessed and touched. It was a moment i would be remembering always and it is a story i would be telling Isabella when she grows up.
My dearest colombian friends, Pablo and Diana was leaving to Australia for a new adventure. I was sad for many days because i missed them but i am also happy as i know they are in a very nice country! Painted this to wish them great journeys in life, no matter how many journey they would be having in life!

Heavily pregnant. We went all the way to the botanical garden on a scorching hot day to take a series of pregnancy photos. It was exhausting but all worth it. I didnt realize i had such a big bump until i look back at those photos...#missingmybabybump


I had some serious hot flashes during my stay in Kuching while waiting to give birth. It was hormonal and i could not control it. I felt sick, caught cold and had flu because i slept near the strong fan without any blanket. It was a waiting game everyday on when Isabella is going to be born.

2 July 2016 - met up with my beautiful dominican republic italian friend who came to Kuching. Never did i ever think that 5 days later Isabella was born!
7 July 2016 - Little Isa chose a nice birthdate for herself. This photo is precious because there was so many emotions in it. I was tired but relieved, and beyond happy after giving birth to little Isa. Pandamopi was beyond words when he saw a very tiny grey baby coming out from me. Baby isa did not give a loud cry. She probably was shy so she cried like a cat!

Isabella is one month old. Confinement is finally over!
Celebrated my birthday as a mom for the first time with family in Kuching

It was tough adjusting to new life, especially with a very young baby and then getting back to work after 1 full months of rooming in with baby 24/7. Grateful for a mom-in-love who came all the way from Penang to help us settled down.
Went straight back to work when Isa was only one month old. I had separation anxiety and cried on my first few days back to work but smiled to myself when nanny's daughter sent me this! Her shirt is too cheeky!! I experienced letdowns when isa is feeding at nanny's. It's amazing how this little one gives me such great strength and motivation to work :D I will never give up!
Little Isa is officially a big sister now because little cousin Oli is born on 10 September 2016. Cant wait to let Isa play with Oli :D 

October 2016
3 months old isa continues to grow into a happy little girl. We can never love her enough :D

Back to The Reading Room with my spanish family again after a long time, this time with Isa in our midst. It was a beautiful moment and what we left in the rooms was memories, nothing else...

It seems that the grey baby that was born 4 months ago knows how to appreciate and enjoy books now :D
 Mom flew in to Singapore to spend some time with Isa and it was a great time..
Attempted to participate in #theadventretreat 2016 but stopped half way due to unforeseen circumstances. Will participate again this year..

 December is exciting. Spend a very short weekend for a wedding but did super many things that in the end Isabella's just dozed off without waking up for milk...

Attended my wedding mc, Gloria & Mervyn's wedding dinner. It was beautiful.

Our very first christmas together. Happy Isa!

12 amazing months, with our fair share of ups and downs. The fact that i am still typing now means life is still great as it is :) Thank you, Lord for your provision and protection! All glory to You.

Tuesday, September 13, 2016


It’s milk time again,
Her tiny tummy is growling,
Her big eyes looking at me,
She opens her lips and cries for milk,
It’s a cue not to be missed,
For once its missed,
A loud cry to follow.

She wriggles and struggles,
Half way through the feed,
Head on my palm,
Buttock seated on my lap,
Gently pat her back,
Counting one to ten,
It’s a cue not to be missed,
For once its missed,
Milk posseting to follow.

Drunken with milk,
Eyes opening and closing,
Neck arching,
Squirming like a worm,
Pouting like ikan puput,
Figuring all the bubbles,
That might have trapped along the way,
It’s a cue not to be missed,
For once its missed,
A loud angry cry to follow.

Suddenly the loud burp came,
So loud and satisfying,
Like a big comma,
Amidst a long sentence,
And so the milking continues,
Peaceful and calm again,
After the long loud burp.


*ikan puput = longfin herring fish

Friday, July 8, 2016

first bath

O’ little Isabella,
tiny little red baby,
day two of life
and she is having her very first bath in life.

Grandma carried her,
With tender and gentleness,
for she is so tiny and cute,
ready to awaken new senses.

Grandma wets little Isa's hair with warm water,
Running her wet fingers in her fine hair,
Gently but firm,
Securely loved,
Slowly places her down in the little green tub.

O’ little Isabella,
She is awakened,
Curious yet exciting,
Cries a little,
Calms after that,
Eyes blinking,
Limbs moving,
In the little green tub,
Full of warm herbal bath,
Such a beautiful sight to see.

When bath time is over,
Grandma picks her up,
And wrap her tightly in a towel.
She smiles with her eyes,
Telling grandma that she likes the bath.

Grandma hugs her so gently,
Pats her down until she’s dry,
Powders her with baby powder,
Puts on clean cloth,
Wraps her in clean linen,
Isabella smells so fresh and clean.

So peaceful and calm,
Ready to milk and
Fall asleep slowly
Into her little dreamland.

birth of our little daughter Isabella

Life is full of surprises. At this juncture of our life,  Pandamopi & I am humbled to be blessed with this beautiful experience in this journey of life – becoming daddy and mummy. The birth of baby Isabella is one of the most beautiful moments in life that we would not forget in this life. It is a miracle and a blessing. We thank God for this little beautiful life given to us.

Labour pain was a long-suffering one – 36 hours or so. Waves of contraction came and go, at increasing frequencies as the interval shortened. Never would I expect that contraction pain could be so unbearable, but the love for our baby enabled me to go for extra miles. Wave after wave of contraction, I know that we get to see baby soon but before that I need to go through this labour of love.

We finally get to see our baby after 36 hours of contraction and 1 hour of active pushing. We would be remembering this magical moment for life. All pain disappeared when we see our beautiful little one as the doctor placed her on my chest. She opens her eyes and blinked gently, trying to figure light for the very first time in her life. No wonder in Spanish, giving birth (dar la luz) literally means “give the light.” Baby sees light the first time when she is born. Such a beautiful moment.

We looked at each other for the first time. Pandamopi and I looked at each other again, overjoyed.

So, we are no longer two but three now. Baby Isabella is joining the bandwagon and we are so looking forward to many exciting moments and adventures ahead!

Friday, July 1, 2016

of squats and stairs climbing...

The waiting game continues as we all are counting down the days of giving birth to Isabella. Most of my friends who were my pregnant buddies who are scheduled to give birth almost the same time as me has already pass through the "exam" one by one. I had a feeling that Isabella and I might be the last team standing. 

The month of June has been a waiting month. I learnt the lesson of being patient, to appreciate the feeling of being pregnant (at least for the very last month or last few weeks). It has been a tiring one, with my baby bump getting bigger and heavier each day. While some of my pregnant buddies are displaying some symptoms like having flu/nasal congestion, diarrhea, nesting syndrome (sleeping a lot and also sudden surge of energy to clean and prepare the nest for baby), back pain, swollen legs and noses, i experienced these symptoms but they come and go. While some pregnant mummies are having swollen legs as early as 3 weeks prior to estimated due date, my legs swelled very minimally even at this moment -- 5 days before due date. As much as I am fearful of the potential pain that I might be facing when giving birth, right now I am more concerned on delivering baby Isabella safely. It is amazing how waiting can somehow dilute fear. 

Upon my sister's and mom's advice on inducing labour naturally, they told me that squats and stairs climbing helps. I tried both stairs climbing and squats every other day. Stairs climbing makes me breathless because it is more to cardio. Started from 10 rounds (up and down) and then slowly increased to 30 rounds. I did squats at the yard some days ago, combined with breathing exercises and then did more squats in bedroom again. Boy, i was sweating a lot and my thighs are burning. Surprisingly, these two exercises did helped the "lightening" process of the baby. I could feel baby bump going slightly downwards. More squats & stairs climbing, and hopefully, we will make it as a team soon, baby!

As I am ending this entry soon, I'm going back to my late pregnancy fitness routine -- more squats and stairs climbing! Bring it on!

Thursday, June 30, 2016

flores silvestres (wildflower)

Ayer estaba pasando un poco de tiempo en el patio y me di cuenta con flores silvestres. Admiré el espíritu de flores silvestres, porque aunque no hay ningún lo mejor condición, se pueden crecer que ningún puede imaginar y me acuerdo una frase sobre las flores silvestres.

"como flores silvestres, debe permitir que crezca en todos los lugares que la gente pensó que nunca lo haría. "


Yesterday I was spending sometime at the patio and I noticed some wild flowers.  I admired the spirit of wild flowers because, even though the condition are not the best, they grow like no one could imagine and I was reminded by a frase about wild flowers. 

"like wildflowers, you must allow yourself to grow in all the places that people thought you never would."

黑眼 hēi yǎn (black eye)

En Kuching tenemos un perro,
se llama hēi yǎn (黑眼),
los ojos negros el significado,
grande pero delgado,
vive en una casa con Junior,
ladran cuando me ven,
como si tuviera un extraño a ellos. 

Hice yoga al aire libre ayer,
los perros me asombran y ladran,
cerré mis ojos,
buscando la paz mientras los perros en medio del caos.

Las manos juntas,
estoy agraciado,
por la vida tan perfecta en este momento,
bendiciones y felicidad,
en el patio trasero de la nuestra casa.


In Kuching we have a dog, 
his name is hēi yǎn (黑眼),
black eyes is its meaning, 
big but thin, 
lives in a house with Junior, 
they bark when they see me, 
as if i am a stranger to them. 

I did yoga in open air yesterday,
the dogs wondered and barked, 
i closed my eyes, 
seeking peace while the dogs are in chaos 

Hands together, 
I am thankful, 
for the perfect life at this moment,
blessings and happiness, 
in this backyard of our house. 

Thursday, June 23, 2016

A rainy day in Kuching

The rain pours as the thunder thumps,
Droplets of rain showered the plants at the backyard,
Forming rain dews on waxy leaves,
In the shelter our dogs are chilling,
In the kitchen mom is cooking,
I sat by the door, overlooking the yard,
Sizzling sounds from the cooking pan synchronizing with the drizzling sounds of rain,
Aroma of fried sambal brinjal amidst the cool rainy breeze,
Renewed and refreshed,
Calm and tranquil,
A rainy day in Kuching.

Sunday, June 19, 2016

belated Father's Day post -- My father, my hero.

It was a hot afternoon. Resting on a sofa at the living room, I heard a series of banging and cutting sound from the kitchen. Dad was repairing the washing machine after his short nap. Clad in his usual long sleeves with maroon colour collar shirt and a black shorts, he sat at the kitchen busy replacing the old pipes which was bitten by rats with new pipe so that our daily laundry could carry on. Well it might looks like a menial task and nothing big, but the rhythm of the banging and cutting sound resulted from the repair works reminds me that God is taking care of my parents. Dad is still healthy and steady. Since young, I always thought dad is my hero, he will always be. Though he is not as expressive with hugs and kisses, he loves us with his actions. For that, I love you Dad. Happy Father's Day everyday and I am blessed to be your daughter. Wish you good health always:)

Friday, June 17, 2016

Contando los dias (counting the days)

Antes de concebirte ya te queria,
Antes de que nacieras ya te amaba, 
Antes de tuvieras una hora de nacido ya moria por ti.
Este es el milagro del amor de madre. 

Before you were conceived, I wanted you. 
Before you were born, I loved you.
Before you were here an hour, I would died for you. 
That is the miracle of love of a mother. 

As i am counting down the days, waiting for Isabella to be born, i thank God for all the days that God has protected and guided me along the way. Nothing should be taken for granted...daily trips to work, monthly routine check-ups and each trip with the little ones in me when flying in the plane. 

Hot flushes

It is one of those days that i feel really really hot again. It is like heat trapped within my body, unable to escape no matter what i do. I sweated profusely and the best place to be is in front of a full blast fan. I touched myself and boy, it felt too warm that I recalled Chunkeat commented that my palms were as hot as an iron.

Back in Singapore, I felt really hot/warm even after a bath and I love to place my hands on his skin which is cool and guess what, I always get a big 'NO!!!' as a response!

Thursday, March 24, 2016

el acantilado

"Cuando Dios te lleva al borde del acantilado, confía en él plenamente y déjate llevar. Sólo 1 de 2 cosas va a suceder, o él te sostiene cuando tu te caes, o te va a enseñar a volar! "

When God brings you to the edge of a cliff, trust in Him completely and let go. Only 1 of 2 things will happen, either He holds you when you fall, or He is going to teach you to fly!

Tuesday, March 22, 2016

el precipicio

"El destino es un precipicio en lo cual caemos sólo si lo miramos por demasiado tiempo". 
Lucian Blaga

Fate is an abyss in which we will fall only if we look at it for too long.
-Lucian Blaga-

We were learning about this word while sharing about our favorite place. One of us spoke about jumping from a cliff which sparked a discussion the difference between "el precipicio" (slightly cantilevered cliff) and "acantilado" (vertical cliff). It was an interesting discovery and discussion. We learn something new everyday.

I decided to document the vocabulary "el precipicio" into my little sketchbook. While doing so, out of curiousity, I discovered this profound quote by a Romanian philosopher, poet, playwright and Novelist -- Lucian Blaga. which I admittedly spent some time thinking about it. In this case, I believe the poet is trying to tell the reader that one should not easily give up on fate. We all have the power to change our fate. The end starts when we start to give up. 

It seems that tonight is a night of reflection. A time to reflect on how we fair in life, and how we march on as we go along. 

Sunday, March 20, 2016

The Lazy Painter's kind of Saturday - Pancake day

I have been craving for pancakes for quite sometime eversince I am pregnant. Some days when I was day dreaming, food images just formed in my head and one fine day, I thought about pancakes with ice-cream and jam. I went to the groceries and bought a box of Betty Crocker Original Complete Pancake Mix (1.04kg) but ended up storing it in my food cabinet because being the lazy painter, i have the tendency to be lazy these days, especially during this pregnancy period. So it sat inside of my storage for a few weeks. Every time i prepare breakfast, lunch or dinner, I would be looking at the pancake mix, wondering when I would pick it up and try making some pancakes. I have been procrastinating for sometime for two reason : firstly, I have never make pancakes by myself before. The last time i had homemade pancakes was probably when i was 7-8 years old when I was still living in Kuching. Secondly, I am afraid of pancakes failure which lead to wastage of ingredient, (which more often than not made me feel guilty because ingredients nowadays are not cheap). 

So last Saturday, I woke up with a sudden interest and determination that I would be experimenting making pancakes. Afterall, the pancake mix claim that making pancakes is as easy as just by adding water into the pancake mix. 

There is even a pancake recipe made easy for all behind the packaging. I felt quite confident looking at it :D Yes, today I shall make pancakes! For a start, I thought it would be great just trying out making 6-7 pancakes which would be perfect just for the two of us. I scooped out 1 cup of the pancake mix and added 3/4 cup of cold fresh milk (instead of water) and start stirring the pancake mix with fork until smooth. I didn't know why I replaced water with milk but that was probably I was confused reading too many recipes few days before. After heating the pan with a little butter (instead of oil), I scooped some batter onto the hot pan. The pancakes were cooking! As per the instruction, when the bubble break on surface and edges just began to dry, I turned the pancakes and cooked about 1 minute / until brown. Guess what ? The pancakes turned out to be successful. The milk gave it a taste of soft tinge of saltiness and the texture was good!!!  

We had the classic toppings : butter and honey. Being a typical Malaysian, we had our pancakes with a good cup of hot Milo. Pandamopi enjoyed the pancakes and being the cook, I enjoyed watching him enjoyed eating the pancakes :D

For many years I had been dreaming of making pancakes breakfast but could not do so due to the circumstances in our rental policies. Now that I am able to do so, I felt very blissful and decided to record this in my little sketchbook. Here you go :)

Monday, March 7, 2016

home sweet home

The afternoon air is still, and the living room was a little dark as the windows and doors were kept close. My parents were out for some chores, brother went working and pandamopi was dozing off upstairs. As I was sitting at the sofa alone, starring at the walls hung with our family portraits taken at different time of our life and little miniatures collections displayed at the fixed wall cabinet, I can’t help but gasped over how time has passed without us really realizing. I wanted to do something to capture the moment and to capture the feeling of that very moment – a sense of happiness yet melancholy. Happy because I have been growing up happily in this house, with many moments including getting married in this house almost 2 years ago. Melancholy because I felt heavy hearted as I realized I have not been able to spend more time as much as I wanted to ever since I left home for study and then working. Coming home now becomes a luxury when for others, it is just a normal thing to do daily.

As I stared at the walls (which I didn’t pay much attention to before) and sketched, I noticed and observed the details of every things that is in place at that moment. Many of the things remained the same place and location, while I am the one busy travelling around, back and forth for work and holidays. These good old things remained here when I came back, giving me a sense of familiarity each time I am home. The composition of how the photographs are hung, speakers, TV, CD rack, video players, miniatures, location of sofa, the fan tucked in one corner, foot massager in front of a large blue sofa… the colours and how these things are placed makes a unique combination of what is familiar to us living in that home. It is our home, a simple home with no fancy interior design, yet filled with warmth.

I continued to wash my sketch with watercolour brushes, as if painting every emotion that I have within me on this little sketchbook that accompanies me wherever I go. I want to freeze this moment and reminisce it each time I miss home, no matter where I am in future. As I was almost completing my sketch, my eyes were wet. The car engine grew louder and then came to a halt. Someone opened the door and there was rays of light coming out from the door. Mom came in and came close to me and saw my sketch.

“It’s beautiful,” she said.
“Just a sketch, mom,” I answered and kept my sketchbook in my Barefoot sling bag and we head to the kitchen to prepare some snack for tea time.


Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Isabella’s first pair // Primer par de Isabella

Last Saturday, Pablo & Diana gifted us some wonderful gifts for our newborn-to-be : 2 cotton jumper and 1 pair of shoes. Diana bought the shoes for Isabella all the way from Bangkok. The first time I saw it, I felt very sweet. I could almost imagine how sweet she would look with her donning the red pair. I could not resist drawing it, to keep a record in my little sketchbook, have it framed in her room (one day when we got our own place) and tell her stories on how much love she got from amazing people all around the world.


I went to see my gynae today to get my 20th week detail scan results and also a follow up check-up. I felt very excited once again upon seeing her through the ultrasound scan. Today her tiny feet are measuring 3.77 cm. One day these feet will grow into healthy feet that will bring her to amazing journeys and adventure in life. We would one day see her walk her first step, and then to many more steps ahead, till one day she is independent to travel on her own.

Version en español

El Sábado pasado, Pablo y Diana nos dotados algunos regalos maravillosos a nuestra bebé -a-ser : 2 puente de bebé algodón y un par de zapatos. Diana compró los zapatos para Isabella todo el camino desde Bangkok. La primera vez que lo vi, me sentí muy dulce. Casi me podía imaginar lo dulce que se vería con ella ponerse el par rojo.

No pude resistir dibujarlo, para mantener un registro en mi cuaderno pequeñito, haga que sea enmarcado en su habitación (un día cuando llegamos a nuestro propio lugar) y contar sus historias sobre la cantidad de amor que recibió de personas increíbles en todo el mundo.


Fue a ver mi gynae hoy para conseguir mis resultados de la exploración semana 20 de detalle y también un chequeo de seguimiento. Me sentí muy emocionado una vez más a verla a través de la ecografía.

Hoy sus diminutos pies están midiendo 3,77 cm. Un día, estos pies se convertirán en los pies saludables que le traerán a los viajes y aventuras increíbles en la vida. Nos gustarías ver algún dia a caminar su primer paso, y luego a muchos más pasos por delante, hasta que un día ella es independiente de viajar por su cuenta.

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

half empty or half full

Last Saturday, I met a new friend, Marielle. We were chatting over some random topics and she brought up an interesting philosophy which I did also read about it sometime ago. It was a great chat because that philosophy serves as a reminder to us. The philosophy we were talking about how we look at a half glass of water – is it half full, or is it half empty.
How we define the half glass of water actually reflects on our attitude towards life – being an optimist or being a pessimist. We either feel appreciative, thankful and happy with what we have or be resentful and unhappy about what we don’t have in life. When life present something unfamiliar or uncertain to us, how do we react towards the situation does influence how we feel and subsequently how we handle the situation. A positive and optimistic mind will motivate and drive us far while a negative and pessimistic attitude will pose many fear and roadblocks even before we assess the whole picture.

The key to move forward in life is always be thankful and grateful. Be happy with what we have (good health, peace, love, family, friends) and also for the greater things that are yet to come. Be happy for NOW, for the very moment we are having right NOW. One of the things we are still learning now is to live in the present moment even as we plan for the future. For some reason, there is power in being optimist – not only to ourselves, but to our spouse and the people around us.

The key to happiness is simplicity. There may be luxuries and advancement of technology, but sometimes we found ourselves reminiscing the simpler things in life and reliving the nostalgia that we had in the good old days. More often than not, simplest joy comes in the simplest form, like a kind gesture, a smile, a home cook dinner, or by just simply being healthy. They are not expensive and most of them are free yet priceless because it comes from the heart. Money can’t buy a smile, because it has to come from a sincere heart. Home cook dinner are the best because it is prepared with love. Money cannot buy health because it takes time and effort to nurture it. While there are many things that are so dependent on money these days, never forget that money is not everything. There is still humane side of things that are free and worth the time in our life.

These days, when I am feeling dejected and jaded, I remind myself to cut the thought – the half empty thought that might give way to pessimistic and bitterness. Rather than dwelling in sadness and the negativity, we would rather invest the energy to improve ourselves or current condition. There is no point in sulking because sulking would not improve the situation. It is our choice to be happy over sadness and we should all forget about self-pities. One of way to draw positive energy from our surroundings is to always think big and wide, think out of the box. Go out and meet new people and always be ready to be inspired. There is always new things to learn every day.

We recently moved out from our rented room into a small cosy home across the street. We are really grateful with this provision because for the first time, we are living happily without stress here in Singapore. Goodbye to all the stress that we had sharing with previous flatmates and landlord. Moving out and living by ourselves, without the presence of landlord and housemates is probably the best decision we had made. We had probably compromise the quality of life sharing a flat with others before this but I guessed we had no choice, given that the housing/flat rental in Singapore is way too exorbitant. Now that we are expecting a baby, this upgrade comes as a double portion blessings which we have been very thankful every day. All I could say is, one cannot stay in a shared flat forever. At some point of time, it is good to move out and live on your own, that is when you really start living properly.

The flat that we are currently renting is nothing fancy, but it is warm. There is a living hall with a small rectangular timber table which we got from Muji Store. It is also a space where @pandamopi loves to surf the internet and read. I personally like to occupy the sofa after a long day, lying down just reading or browsing from my mobile. We sometimes play our favourite music over the speaker or watch a movie together. Recently we watched Steve Jobs.

We have a small corridor outside our flat where we dry our laundry and planted some herbs for own consumption. At the moment, we have tomatoes, bell peppers, basil, lemon balm, spring onion and orchids in our little garden. For some reason, the plants helped to spruce and liven up our house entrance, giving some life and energy to an otherwise a mundane flat unit. Every morning before heading out to work, we shower the plants with water and love. It brings us so much joy and happiness to see how plants are growing every day under the sun and outdoor environment (we previously kept our plants in bedroom which is very much deprived from sunlight).

The kitchen is always kept warm with me starting the day early in the kitchen preparing lunch boxes and cooking dinner in the evening. Occasionally, I love to snip a few of our home-grown lemon balm leaves and mix it into our cups of lime juice. The concoction of juice exudes positivity and wellness and our body seems to be happier these days with these little details and interaction with nature.

As the day is drawing to an end, we progressed to our simple bed room. It is a place we rest our heads. There is a small window by the side that allows natural ventilation to breeze through the room while we sleep and let the gentle light in as morning approaches.

For some, there might not be anything special living in this particularly small HDB or it might not be good enough for some, but like the half full and hall empty philosophy. We are more then contented and thankful with what we are blessed. It makes us feel happy to start the day and grateful as we end the day by retreating to bed peacefully. And as we close our eyes and allow the natural lullabies emitted from the good old fan, we say a word of thank you to our Lord Jesus our provider and kiss each other goodnight.

Monday, February 22, 2016

mi dulce bebé

20th week, another milestone achieved. Half of the journey is done, another half to go. So far there had been so much emotion involved and every experience is precious. It is a life-changing journey so far, so much so the changes are big enough to make you stop, slow down and think as you journey forward. This is a point where I come to taste and realize the changes, emotions and experience taking place when my mom first had me and why my parents are making certain decisions this and that way. It is as if you are replaying your parents’ video reel of parenthood but this time you are feeling every single emotion they were feeling at that very moment. It is surreal and unbelievable, but that is the reality.

I wrote a poem recording my emotions and joy upon seeing our baby in 20 week anomaly scan this morning. The feeling is vivid. As much as I am excited to see you, my baby, I am wondering if you feel the same that your mom-to-be is seeing you and feeling extremely excited.

My sweet baby
Nine thirty at Thomson Suites,
In a small cosy room,
With a lady radiographer,
My heart is calm yet excited,
For I am going to see you today, my baby.

It is our monthly ritual thing,
For mummy to see you,
They call it ultrasound scanning,
I call it opening the window to see,
How you, my baby is doing in there.

Entering the dimly lit room,
Lying on the couch,
Pulling up my dress,
Scanner with gel on my belly,
I opened my belly window and
I saw you, my baby, this morning.

You moved from up to down,
Legs wide opened and crossed,
You moved your hands,
Placing them on your lips, then your face,
Oh, baby, You are so active today.

Your little heart is pumping fast,
Supplying blood to your tiny self,
I closed my eyes and gave thanks,
For this miracles that is happening in me.

Your little arms and hands,
So fine and beautiful,
Clenching tightly and firmly,
“Baby, open up your fingers.”
I tapped my womb and whispered to you.
Slowly you opened up your hands,
Showed me your perfect palms.

One second you sat upside down,
Legs opened wide,
And kicked me hard the next second,
I never knew what you were doing in there,
When I am busy working.

Are you also eating when I am eating ?
Are you sleeping when I am sleeping ?
Did you hear papa whisper you goodnight kisses ?
Did I pressed on you accidentally when sleeping ?
Did you felt papa’s goodnight massage ?
Are you busy playing when mummy is working ?
Do you enjoy living in mummy, walking with mummy
and hearing mummy’s voice ?

Never would I thought,
That I would fell in love
With someone I have never met.
Never would I thought,
That my heart would grew
So tender and loving.
Never would I thought,
You made us feel happy and blissful.
Never would I thought,
I would miss someone so much.

All Glory to be our God,
For the most perfect gift
To our humble marriage.
We love,
Because You Loved Us first,
And now seal our love with
A sweet baby girl.

Spanish version :
mi dulce bebé
Las nueve y media, de Thomson Suites,
En una pequeña habitación acogedora,
Con una señora radiólogo,
Mi corazón está en calma aún excitado,
Para que voy a verte hoy, mi bebé.

Es lo nuestro ritual mensual,
Para mamá a ver que,
Lo llaman la ecografía,
Yo lo llamo la apertura de la ventana para ver,
¿Cómo usted, mi bebé está haciendo ahí.

Al entrar en la habitación con poca luz,
Recostado en el sofá,
Tirando hacia arriba de mi vestido,
Escáner con gel en el vientre,
Abrí la ventana y el vientre
Yo te vi, mi bebé, esta mañana.

Has desplazado de arriba a abajo,
Las piernas bien abiertas y cruzadas,
Has movido las manos,
Lo colocaste en tus labios, y tu cara,
Oh, bebé, eres tan activo en este momento.

Tu pequeño corazón está bombeando rápido,
El suministro de sangre a su pequeño auto,
Cerré los ojos y dio gracias,
Por esta milagros que está sucediendo en mí.

Sus pequeños brazos y las manos,
Tan fino y hermoso,
Apretando con fuerza y ​​firmeza,
" Bebé, abrir los dedos."
Golpeé mi vientre y le susurré en tu caso.
Lentamente abriste tus manos,
Me mostraste las palmas perfectos.

Un segundo que se sentó al revés,
Las piernas se abrieron,
Y me dio una patada con fuerza al segundo siguiente,
Nunca supe lo que estaba haciendo allí,
Cuando estoy ocupado trabajando.

¿Tu también está comiendo cuando estoy comiendo?
¿Estás durmiendo cuando estoy durmiendo?
¿Has oído susurro papa besos de buenas noches?
¿Hice Presioné en forma accidental cuando se duerme?
¿Te sentiste masaje de buenas noches de papá?
¿Estás ocupado de juego cuando la mamá está trabajando?
¿Te gusta vivir en mamá, caminando con mamá
y escuchar la voz de la mamá?

Nunca hubiera pensado,
Que me enamoró
Con alguien que nunca he conocido.
Nunca hubiera pensado,
Que mi corazón se creció
Tan tierno y amoroso.
Nunca hubiera pensado,
Se nos hizo sentir feliz y dichosa.
Nunca hubiera pensado,
Me perdería tanto a alguien.

Toda la gloria a ser nuestro Dios,
Para el regalo más perfecto
Para nuestra humilde matrimonio.
Nos encanta,
Debido a que usted nos ha amado primero,
Y ahora sellar nuestro amor con
Una niña dulce.

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Reflections @ 2015

2015 passed by without us doing much in counting down or anticipating the arrival 2016. Too much has taken place at that transition period and we barely have time to sit down and reflect and make resolutions.

Ever since my younger days, when the years were drawing to an end, it is almost like a habit for me to ponder and reflect on how I did for the year. This was done on 31 December 2014, with me wrapping up the amazing year with my doodles.

I did the same for 2015, but did not manage to find any time to pen it down. I guessed it is never too late to count my blessings in 2015.

If there is a word of phrase for me to describe the year 2015, it would be bittersweet. The roller-coaster journey has once again shaped both of us. It was not a total smooth-sailing one but we believe we made it because He brought us through, with sufficient grace and mercy.

Jan 2015

The year started enthusiastically with us penning our resolutions for 2015.

We had a rough start in Jan 2015 when we discovered that our pregnancy was not successful. Doctor diagnosed that it was blighted ovum and we would not be able to keep the baby.

We were terribly sad and painful and felt that life is too cruel, giving us sweet surprise one moment and took it away from us the next moment. I spent a reasonable amount of time at home at this start of new year at home, nursing myself physically and mentally.

Feb 2015

Slowly recovering from our nightmare, there was Chinese New Year with both sides of family gracing us warmly with love and food.

And then, we celebrated Friendship day together with Spanish peeps by writing wishes and then exchange them randomly. I got a pretty good one : Viaja y conoce el mundo. Es una de las pocas cosas que te puedes comprar para enriquecer tu vida. (To travel and know the world. It is one of the few things that you could buy to enrich your life). This is really good and looking back, we really had a great year travelling after that.

March 2015

March turns out to be exciting as ever, with lots of opportunities to sketch, draw and paint. Travelled to Muar, Vietnam and then to Muar again for my cousin’s wedding. Bought 2 sketchbooks for my two lovely cousins and encourage them to write and sketch.

April 2015

Started an exciting project together with our fellow artistic friends – Kartika, Astrid and Richard at Jorge’s dive shop.

Baby Ethan arrived to this world. We are officially auntie and uncle now. We were pretty excited to celebrate his full moon in the following month.

May 2015

Baby Ethan is one month old. He was still so small and cried at little new things he experienced like pooping, peeing, hunger and thirst for milk, cuddling.

I can’t help but feeling motherly when I carried baby Ethan. He is such a love.

May has always been our favourite month because we got married in the month of May. So it is a ritual for us to travel somewhere special to celebrate our love while appreciating the beauty of God’s creation in all over the world. We celebrated our anniversary in the possibly most magical place in the world – Istanbul. The trip was made even more beautiful with us getting to know 2 amazing friends along the way, Ali, Paulo & Joao.

May is also the month that I started my greeting card & illustration business in Carousell. Nothing was sold until June.

June 2015

I painted and sold the first wedding card. Had the first taste of entrepreneurship. The month continues to be busy

July 2015

Participated in an online art contest by drawing a camel. Did not win anything but I was still feeling very happy with it. Now the artwork is hanged in our new crib!

August 2015
Churros for birthday. Nothing elaborate, just simple joy.
Received my first ever colombian handmade bag from Pablo & Diana. Love it to bits.

September 2015

Celebrated Pablo’s birthday. Painted a huge birthday card. Singapore was hit with massive haze and we had to put on masks.

Saying goodbye to a project manager which I worked closely with in CGH. I didn’t like saying good bye, but it always makes me reflect what is my next step when people are moving on one by one.

October 2015

Travelled to Bandung for a short getaway. Visited Batu Kawah, spent some time together chilling out by just being away from the hustle and bustle of Singapore.

November 2015

November is a special month for both of us because we started being together in the month of November. As we grow together, there is no need elaborate celebrations or expenditures to make the day special. Being together itself is the most special thing in life. It is also the month that we discovered that we are pregnant. I could not help but feeling emotional about it. He made me cry because he bought me a card and wrote me a long letter (something I always look forward to). Our pregnancy is also the reason that I barely have time to write and reflect, having to cope with my morning sickness.

Picked up urban gardening as a hobby. Our first gardener's meet up was at Jorge's place over a cuppa of Greek Coffee. 

December 2015

We celebrated Chunkeat, Diana, Michele and Ress’ birthday in the month of December. The theme was musical. Chunkeat requested me to make a couple headgear and I made it specially for the occasion.
Loved the outcome so much that after the party, we framed our headgear as remembrance. Christmas month is another busy month for me with lots of Christmas greeting card order. By this time, I was a little exhausted with my pregnancy and had some trouble coping with order but thank God all went well.

It was definitely not the easiest year but turned out to be a beautiful year. There is a saying that goes, “In Life, Expect the Unexpected.”

Life has many ways of surprising us, in a good or bad way. There were many laughter and tears along the way, but the journey is amazing because we ride together.